What do u do when the person u adore no longer cares about you? please give me motivational advice.i am torn?

K, so my partner of over 3 yrs and I broke up on Sunday. We have been living together for almost 2yrs and i have a 7 yr old...he is not the father but has been in his life since he was 3....my son adores him, i have no complaints there....lately our relationship has been rocky and it is all the result of him cheating on me several months back,,,i took him back because i realize we all make mistakes but i never really got over it.....he was with her for 3 months and i cannot get past the betrayal..i am sure they he ended things with her which is how i found out cause she was so hurt that he didnt want anything with him and kept calling her....so anyways i tried getting past it but i did bring it up several times and he is the type to get mad and not talk for days even tho we live in the same house....i have always been there for him and my son and they were always a priority even tho i work and went to school full time,,,just finished and will b going to grad school this fall..yet i do all the cooking the cleaning washing his clothes and all the extra things like mages and lil gifts and stuff like that to show him i care....anyways a couple weeks ago he wasnt talking to me and i was so depressed since i dont take him for granted it always gets 2me when we fight so i went out to watch the laker game with my sis and got super drunk...i was intoxicated, angry and hurt and flipped when i got home,,,,i slapped him and told him to leave my house....he wont forgive me for that and hasnt made love to me for almost a month doesnt kiss me and has been very distant....so then he decides to just go out out of nowhere whenever he feels without even inviting me or letting me know....we got into it and he told me he didnt love me anymore and that he was only with me cause my son....he told me he didnt even want to make love to a person that put hands on him....i know i messed up but i forgave infidelity and once he got drunk he pushed me to the ground but i understood he was drunk n didnt hold it against him...he told me he stopped caring about me and doesnt care if i cry or have someone else or not....i am torn apart and he still sleeps in my bed....he tried hugging me last night cause "hes used to it he said" but why if he doesnt feel the same why play with me? i have forgiven him sooo many things and i am not perfect but i saw him as family so i understand we are human...i have tried so much to make this relationship work but he has clearly told me he doesnt care...but how can i be strong enough to get over this...its hard since he lives there and i adore him and miss him so much....but he just doesnt love or respect me anymore....he told me i look so dumb crying to stop crying but it his words hurt so much coming from this guy whove ive shared it all with....